Agatha Christie's Seven Dials review – think Downton Abbey is real? This terrible adaptation is for you

Netflix's latest adaptation of Agatha Christie's Seven Dials is a sorry sight, a jumbled mess of period costume, clipped vowels, and a plot as dull as it is predictable. This time around, director Chris Chibnall has taken the reins from Sarah Phelps, whose thoughtful and atmospheric takes on Christie's works are sorely missed here.

The story begins with Iain Glen getting brutally killed by a bull in Ronda, Spain, before we're whisked away to a grand house in England where a party is underway. The Cootes, two northern industrialists, have rented the house from Lady Caterham (Helena Bonham Carter), who's struggling financially. As you'd expect, this sets up a world of class differences and comedic misunderstandings, but it's all done with a heavy hand, resulting in some cringe-worthy moments, particularly when it comes to the Cootes' ridiculous dialogue.

Lady Coote (Bonham Carter) is portrayed as a social climber, always on the lookout for a way to improve her station in life. However, if you're going to make fun of someone's social status, at least try to get their grammar right. It's like they're trying to mock the upper class without ever actually being convincing.

As the story progresses, we meet Bundle (Mia McKenna-Bruce), the daughter of Lady Caterham, who becomes embroiled in a mystery involving eight alarm clocks – or "dials" – hidden around her brother Gerry Wade's room. It all seems like a lot of fuss over something that could easily have been solved with a bit more attention to detail.

Bundle decides to investigate, aided by a local policeman who breaks everything he touches, and a mysterious prankster (Nabhaan Rizwan) whose true intentions are never fully explained. Along the way, we're treated to some clichéd scenes of Bundle looking at telltale stains on furniture and interviewing crying maids.

Just when you think it can't get any worse, Martin Freeman arrives as real detective Supt Battle, who somehow manages to bring a bit of much-needed credibility to the proceedings. His presence is a welcome relief from the dullness that has preceded him.

In the end, Seven Dials feels like a retro adaptation done without flair or finesse. It's a jumbled mess of period costume and plot holes, with more focus on emotional wellbeing than actual storytelling. If you're an Agatha Christie fan, you might be able to get through this uninspired three-hour slog, but for the rest of us, it's a skippable affair.
 
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I just watched Seven Dials on Netflix and I gotta say, it was like they took all the excitement and charm outta Agatha Christie's story 🤕. The costumes were fancy but that's about it. They really needed to dial back (lol) the period drama vibes and focus more on the actual mystery. The acting was decent, Helena Bonham Carter is still got it 💁‍♀️, but even she couldn't save this mess from itself. I think they tried too hard to be witty and ended up being cringeworthy instead 😳. And who needs 8 alarm clocks?! It's like they took every cliche from a detective movie and mashed them all together 🕰️. Martin Freeman was the only one who brought any real depth to the story, but even he couldn't save it 🤷‍♂️. All in all, I'd say skip this one unless you're an die-hard Agatha fan 💔.
 
I'm so underwhelmed by Netflix's latest adaptation of Seven Dials 😒. They completely missed the mark on capturing the essence of Agatha Christie's works. The script is clunky and the plot is as dull as a butter knife 🤣. Iain Glen's character getting killed by a bull in Spain? What a random twist! 🐃 It feels like they threw a bunch of ingredients together without thinking about how they'd all work together.

And don't even get me started on the dialogue – it's cringe-worthy 😳. The Cootes' ridiculous one-liners had me rolling my eyes so hard I'm surprised they didn't fall out of their heads 🤦‍♀️. And Lady Coote? More like Lady Clueless 👑.

The only saving grace is Martin Freeman as Detective Battle – he's the only one who brings any semblance of credibility to this mess 😊. But even his presence can't save this adaptation from its overall dullness and lack of finesse 💔. If you're an Agatha Christie fan, you might be able to stomach it, but for everyone else, let's just say it's a skippable affair 🎬.
 
🤕 I gotta say, Netflix's latest take on Seven Dials is a real letdown 🙅‍♂️. The production values are solid, I'll give 'em that 💯, but the execution falls flat in every aspect. First off, Chris Chibnall's direction feels all over the place – it's like he took some notes from the style guide and then threw them out the window 🚮.

And don't even get me started on the dialogue 🗣️. I mean, come on, folks! If you're gonna make fun of someone's social status, at least try to get their grammar right 😂. Lady Coote's attempts at humor fall flat because she sounds like a caricature rather than an actual person 👀.

The plot's predictable from the get-go 📝. It's like they knew exactly what would be "dialing" for laughs 🤣 and just went through the motions 🔴. The mystery involving the eight alarm clocks is a total cop-out – it's like they couldn't even be bothered to come up with something original 🚫.

The only redeeming quality of this adaptation is Martin Freeman, who brings some much-needed gravitas to the role 💡. But let's be real, he can only carry this mess for so long 😩.

Overall, Seven Dials feels like a lazy cash-grab 🤑. If you're an Agatha Christie fan, you might be able to get through it without too much pain 🤕, but for everyone else? Forget about it 💥.
 
Ugh, Netflix really dropped the ball on this one! 🤦‍♂️ #DisappointedNetflixFan I mean, what happened to Chris Chibnall taking over? He has some experience with period dramas, but I guess you can't win 'em all 😔 #SevenDialsLetdown The costume design is fire, though 🔥 #PeriodPerfect But the rest of it? Forget about it. They took Agatha Christie's classic and turned it into a lazy, predictable mess 🤯 #AgathaChristieDeservedBetter At least Martin Freeman showed up to save the day 💪 #CredibilitySavesTheDay But overall, this is a skippable adaptation that fails to deliver on all fronts 😴
 
I just watched this new Netflix adaptation of Seven Dials and I gotta say, it was soooo boring 🤯♂️. They tried too hard to be period-perfect with all the fancy costumes and everything, but it felt like they forgot about the actual story 😴. The acting wasn't bad or anything, but the plot just dragged on forever. I mean, what's up with eight alarm clocks being a mystery? That was so lame 💔. And don't even get me started on the Cootes' dialogue - cringe-worthy is an understatement 🤣. The only good part was Martin Freeman showing up as the detective and bringing some sanity to the whole thing 😌. Overall, I'd say skip it unless you're a die-hard Agatha Christie fan 📚💨
 
🤦‍♂️ ugh, what a complete waste of time and money! i mean, come on, an adaptation of Agatha Christie's Seven Dials? get it right or don't bother 🙄. this version is like they took every cliche from the book, threw them in a blender, and hit puree. period costume = yawn, clipped vowels = cringe, predictable plot = zzz... 🌮 and don't even get me started on the dialogue 😂. i felt like i was watching an episode of downton abbey's awkward cousin 🤣. anyone who loves agatha christie must be super disappointed in this mess 🤕. personally, i'd rather watch paint dry on a Sunday afternoon 💤.
 
Netflix's Seven Dials is like a badly made puzzle - all pieces are there, but they don't quite fit 🤔. They try to pack in too much period drama and not enough mystery 😴. And what's with the cringe-worthy dialogue? 🙄
 
I gotta say, Netflix's new adaptation of Seven Dials is super disappointing 🤕 It feels like they took all the interesting bits from Agatha Christie's original story and mashed them together with some lazy writing and questionable character choices. The acting isn't bad, I mean Iain Glen as a victim of a bull in Spain was pretty funny 😂, but overall it just feels like a big mess.

I think what really grinds my gears is how they treated Lady Coote's social status 🙄. It's one thing to make fun of someone's class, but the execution here is so off-putting it makes you cringe every time she speaks. And don't even get me started on the ridiculous dialogue from the Cootes 🤣.

The plot is just too predictable and relies way too much on clichés 🔥. Who needs eight alarm clocks hidden around a room to be solved with some basic detective work? 😒 The only good thing about this adaptation is Martin Freeman's presence, but even he can't save it from the dullness that permeates every scene 🤷‍♂️.
 
🤦‍♂️ I totally agree, what a disappointment 🙄! They really messed up the adaptation. Chris Chibnall should have taken some notes from Sarah Phelps' thoughtful approaches 😔. The whole thing feels so forced and predictable. And don't even get me started on Helena Bonham Carter's dialogue - it's cringeworthy 😂. The only bright spot was Martin Freeman as detective Supt Battle, but that wasn't enough to save the movie 🙅‍♂️. It just felt like a lazy three-hour slog 📺.
 
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