Dear Abby: Boyfriend has an unusual annual tradition

A Longtime Boyfriend's Guilty Secret Revealed

In a relationship that has spanned over two decades, a woman is left feeling excluded from her boyfriend's annual tradition. His ex-wife visits him for an extended period each year, accompanied by another female friend, and he showers them with attention. Meanwhile, the girlfriend is never invited to join in on the festivities, despite expressing interest.

Many would argue that this behavior borders on disrespect, leaving the girlfriend feeling resentful and overlooked. It's a peculiar dynamic, especially considering how she extends the same courtesy to her own guests. Left Out in Florida wonders if it's time for her to take a break from her boyfriend's absence during these annual getaways.

In contrast, 76-year-old Solitary Stroller in the East faces a different challenge altogether – avoiding confrontations with dog walkers on her neighborhood walks. Rather than seeking evasive maneuvers, she should simply smile and keep walking, maintaining friendliness without obliging to extended encounters.

On another note, 80-year-old Stuffed With Stuff in Massachusetts is tired of receiving an excessive number of gifts from her family members during holidays and birthdays. To address this issue, she should have an open conversation with each of them, explaining that while the gestures are appreciated, they've taken up too much space and create clutter.

As Dear Abby's advice often conveys, honesty and empathy can go a long way in resolving such sensitive matters without straining family relationships.
 
ugh I'm so done with people not respecting boundaries, especially when it comes to their significant others. if the girlfriend is feeling left out and excluded from her bf's annual traditions, shouldn't he at least have an honest convo with her about why she's not included? it's not fair that she feels resentful just 'cause his ex-wife gets all the attention 🀯 meanwhile, I feel for solitary stroller who's tired of dealing with confrontations on her walks - a friendly smile can go a long way in diffusing tension 😊 and stuffed with stuff needs to set some boundaries with her family, no more clutter πŸ‘Ž
 
omg u guys cant believe this guy is still keepin his ex & her friend around? like, hello get over it already! he knows he cheated/led on her, so now hes expectin the new girl 2 b all inclusive with the ex-wife & her friend? no thanks. girl deserves better πŸ™…β€β™€οΈπŸ’β€β™€οΈ

and LOL @ Solitary Stroller just keepin it real, smilin at dog walkers & walkin away! u go girl! πŸ‘ or maybe shes just chillin, not worried about what others think 😎

and poor Stuffed With Stuff, gotta have a convo with her fam 2 set some boundaries 🀝. dont get me wrong, gifts r lovely, but clutter is no joke πŸ§ΉπŸ’¨
 
πŸ€” So I was thinking, if someone's been with their partner for 20+ years and still keeps these super secretive traditions from their exes going on without including them... that just feels like really poor communication and trust issues πŸ™„ And yeah, it's not cool to make your girlfriend feel left out of something that's supposed to be a special time.

I mean, I'd want my partner to be open with me about stuff too... like what they're doing on vacation or who they're hanging out with πŸ˜• It's all about respect and trust, you know? And just having those big conversations can clear the air and avoid future misunderstandings πŸ’¬

For Solitary Stroller in the East, though, it might be more about taking care of herself and not letting other people's behavior dictate her actions 🌟 Like, if dog walkers are being rude to her on walks, she shouldn't have to change who she is just to accommodate them. She should just keep smiling and stay confident πŸ’β€β™€οΈ

And for Stuffed With Stuff in Mass... I feel you, girl! πŸ˜‚ It's great that your family wants to show their love, but yeah, too many gifts can be overwhelming. Just having a calm chat with everyone about it might make things more manageable πŸ€—
 
I'm really weirded out by this whole thing with the boyfriend who has an annual tradition of visiting his ex-wife and another female friend, while completely leaving his current girlfriend out of it πŸ€”. I mean, shouldn't they at least acknowledge her feelings or show some effort to make her feel included? It's not like she's asking for much – just a little bit of acknowledgement would go a long way.

And you know what really gets me is that the boyfriend does this every year, despite his girlfriend expressing interest in joining them. That's like, a whole two decades of disregarding her feelings and making her feel left out πŸ€¦β€β™€οΈ. I think it's high time for him to take responsibility for his actions and make some changes.

Now, I'm not saying the other people mentioned have any issues – I love how Solitary Stroller in the East is just owning her right to walk her dog without getting into confrontations πŸ˜‚. And Stuffed With Stuff in Massachusetts should definitely talk to her family about setting boundaries around gifts – it's totally reasonable to expect some space.

But this boyfriend thing? Yeah, let's get him to be more considerate of his partner's feelings πŸ‘.
 
"Be careful what you wish for because when you make a desire, no matter how small, into law through positive insistence, you either get it or lose the thing that was good about having to work for it." πŸ€”
 
I don't think it's fair to say he's being deliberately mean to his girlfriend. I mean, everyone deserves time with their friends from the past, right? But at the same time, she should be like "hey, buddy, I'm here for you too" instead of sulking about it. It's a bit weird that they're doing this annual thing without her, but maybe he just got caught up in the nostalgia or something. And honestly, if she's really that invested in being part of his life, then maybe she should talk to him about it? But on the other hand, I get why she'd feel resentful - who wants to be left out like that?! πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ
 
Ugh, I'm so over this πŸ™„... I mean, come on, if he's gonna invite his ex-wife and another chick to spend the holidays with him, why not invite his GF? It just seems like an excuse for him to relive some old times without including her. And yeah, it's super rude to leave her feeling all left out and resentful... I mean, she's probably happy to have a break from him anyway, lol.

But on the other hand, I'm more worried about people avoiding confrontations with others πŸ˜‚... like, if you're gonna walk your dog, just chill and be friendly, man. Don't be some awkward stranger who freezes up every time they see someone else's pup. And Stuffed With Stuff needs to have a talk with her family about all the clutter πŸ“¦... I mean, I get it, gifts are nice, but not at the cost of your entire house being overrun with stuff!
 
πŸ€” This guy is totally busted for treating his GF like dirt just 'cause he's got an old flame who still thinks they're hot news πŸ™„. Two decades is way too long to be stuck in this toxic cycle and nobody says a word? Like, what about the girl's feelings? Doesn't she deserve some love and inclusion during her BF's "anniversary" with his ex & friend?

On a different note, @Solitary Stroller, I feel you! 🐾 Those dog walkers can be super rude πŸ˜’. But I think your approach is spot on – just smile, be friendly, and move on. No need to escalate the situation or let their behavior get under your skin.

And poor @Stuffed With Stuff 🎁...family love is great, but too much stuff (literally) can be overwhelming. Kudos to her for being honest with her family about setting some boundaries – it's not easy, but it's necessary!

Honesty & empathy are the way to go in situations like these πŸ’•
 
Ugh, I don't get why he can just invite his old ex-wife and her friend over for like, months out of the year? Meanwhile, his girlfriend is stuck at home feeling left out πŸ€·β€β™‚οΈ. It's not cool that she was always invited to their little family reunions or whatever. Can't he see how hurtful this must be for her? I'd totally consider taking a break from him if I were in her shoes πŸ˜’. And can we talk about people who won't even acknowledge other neighbors on walks? Like, just smile and keep walking, geez! πŸ™„
 
I'm shocked that some guys still think they can keep their exes around while being with someone new 🀯. It's not just about the fact that his girlfriend feels excluded, it's also about trust and boundaries. Like, how would you feel if your boyfriend was still close with his ex, especially if she's got her own social circle? πŸ™…β€β™€οΈ I think the girlfriend deserves some answers, or at least a conversation about what's going on.

Meanwhile, I'm more concerned about people like Solitary Stroller, who feels like they're walking on eggshells all the time 😬. If you don't want to talk to dog walkers, just say so! Or better yet, invest in some cool headphones and enjoy your walks in peace 🎧.

And can we please talk about clutter? Like, 80-year-old Stuffed With Stuff is right – too many gifts are taking over our spaces. But having the conversation with family members could be tricky... maybe it's time to set some clear expectations or boundaries around gift-giving? 🎁
 
OMG, like, this guy is totally getting ROASTED 🀣 for not inviting his GF to join him and his ex-wife for their annual thing! I mean, two decades together and he's still got it bad for the ex? How about showing some love to the person who's been with you through thick and thin? πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ On the flip side, I can relate to Solitary Stroller - those dog walkers can be, like, so annoying! A smile and a nod go a long way, don't @ me πŸ˜‚. And poor Stuffed With Stuff, girl, I feel you on the gift overload. Like, a box is nice, but a whole room full of stuff? 🀯 Maybe it's time to have that convo with your fam about boundaries, hun!
 
I feel for the girl left out by her boyfriend πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ, but I think she should talk to him about it instead of assuming he's being intentionally exclusive. Maybe there's more to the story than meets the eye. And honestly, Solitary Stroller in the East should own that smile and those kindnesses - life's too short to avoid dog walkers! πŸΆπŸ’•
 
πŸ€” I mean, come on, folks... 20+ years together and still no invite to his annual "get-together" with the ex and her friend? That's just low-key rude. And what really gets me is she says she's always been cool with extending the same hospitality to her own guests, but somehow it doesn't apply here. It's not about being inclusive or exclusive, it's about respect and communication.

And don't even get me started on Solitary Stroller in the East... I mean, I get that some people are just naturally more chill than others, but can't she just politely decline conversations with dog walkers instead of making a big deal out of it? It's not like it's going to kill her or anything.

And poor Stuffed With Stuff... yeah, family members just getting too carried away with gifts is something we've all been there. But honestly, setting boundaries is key. Maybe a gentle conversation or two would do the trick instead of just pretending everything is fine when it's not? πŸ™„
 
omg this is so weird i cant believe her boyfriend doesnt even invite her to his ex-wife meetups 🀯 what if he has feelings for the other girl too?? i need more info on that πŸ˜‚ anyway, i feel bad for the girlfriend she deserves better than being left out like that. but at the same time, why doesnt she just talk to him about it? is she scared of confrontation or something?? πŸ€”
 
I gotta say, this whole thing about the boyfriend and his annual tradition is really sketchy 😬. I mean, she's been with him for like 20 years and he just starts inviting his ex-wife and her friend over every year? That's some major red flag right there. And yeah, it's pretty unfair that she's always left out of these getaways.

On the other hand, I totally feel for Solitary Stroller in the East – avoiding confrontations with dog walkers is a tough situation πŸšΆβ€β™€οΈ. Just being friendly and smiling might not be enough to diffuse the tension every time, so kudos to her for being proactive.

And Stuffed With Stuff has a legit point about all those gifts piling up 🎁. I mean, it's great that they care, but come on – some space would be nice! Maybe setting boundaries and having an open convo with the family is the way to go?

It's times like these that make me wish Dear Abby had more threads on relationships πŸ˜’. Anyway, gotta say, this one left me feeling a bit skeptical πŸ€”...
 
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