Dear Abby: My son thinks I took his money and hasn’t spoken to me since

A Family Betrayed: When a Heir's Anger Turns on the Trustee

When a mother passes away leaving behind a sizable inheritance, one would expect her children to be grateful for their good fortune. But not in this case. A son, who had been estranged from the rest of his family due to his mother's manipulative ways, became incensed when he discovered that his inheritance was being managed by his sister, the trustee of their parents' estate.

The situation took a dark turn when the son, who had always fantasized about receiving a larger share of the inheritance than he actually did, began to accuse his sister of "stealing" his money. He then threatened to cut off contact with the rest of the family unless his demands were met. The situation became even more unbearable for the sister, who was left feeling guilty and isolated.

The root cause of this betrayal is complex, but it appears that the son's anger and resentment had been festering for years, ever since his mother passed away six years ago. She had promised him a larger share of her inheritance, but ultimately failed to follow through on that promise.

The sister is now grappling with feelings of guilt and regret over excluding her estranged son from any further monetary distributions from their own trust. However, it seems that some wounds run too deep, and it may be necessary to re-evaluate estate plans in order to protect the well-being of other family members who have been hurt by the son's actions.

Abby Van Buren suggests that forgiving her client in her heart, but not rewarding his bad behavior by changing her estate plans. She also recommends discussing with a lawyer leaving the son's share of the inheritance in trust for their grandchildren instead, as a way to mitigate the harm caused by his betrayal.

This case highlights the complexities and challenges that can arise when family members are torn apart by greed and resentment. It serves as a reminder that some relationships may be beyond repair, and it's essential to prioritize the well-being of those who have been hurt the most.
 
🤕 I feel so bad for the sister in this situation - she's already carrying the weight of being a trustee, and now her own brother is making her life even harder 🙄. It's like he's trying to sabotage her efforts just because he didn't get what he wanted from mom's will. The worst part is that he's using guilt to get what he wants - it's not fair to her at all 😡.

I think the sister should definitely talk to a lawyer about adjusting the trust, maybe leaving some of the money for their kids instead 🤝. That way, she can ensure that her own family isn't getting hurt because of her brother's selfishness 🙅‍♀️. It's like Abby Van Buren said - forgiving in your heart is one thing, but rewarding bad behavior with more pain is just not okay 😔.
 
😬 this situation is like a ticking time bomb, one wrong move could lead to more damage & hurt feelings 🤕 family dynamics can be so complicated, sometimes you just gotta accept that some relationships are toxic 💔 & it's better to prioritize everyone's well-being over anyone's ego or sense of entitlement 🙅‍♂️
 
🤯 omg u guys can u believe this?! like his mom promised him more money but she died and left everything to her other kids... like who does that?! 😱 and now he's all mad because she didn't leave him as much? it's just so unfair 🙄 like if he was good to their mom maybe she would've made sure he got more 💸 but nope his whole family hated him and this is what happens 🤷‍♂️
 
omg i just had the craziest dream last night lol anyway this inheritance thing reminds me of when my aunt left her entire fortune to our cousin who has like 3 cats 🐈🐈🐈 she's still living in that tiny apartment with no money and it's so sad. i feel bad for the sister in this story, but like yeah some people just can't handle their own emotions 😩. I've been meaning to ask my aunt about her will, just curious what happens when someone passes away with no will or whatnot 🤔
 
I'm low-key surprised how many ppl think they deserve more than others just 'cause their mom promised them something 🤷‍♂️. Like, what if she didn't actually mean it? Or what if other family members are more deserving of her inheritance? We need to stop expecting people to "follow through" on emotional promises and start thinking about the real consequences of our actions 💸. And honestly, can we please just stop playing the victim card when someone else is feeling guilty or hurt? It's time to take responsibility for our own emotions and stop using them as an excuse to be toxic towards others 🤯
 
I'm so down with these estranged siblings! I mean, can you blame the sister for feeling guilty when her bro is being super unreasonable? It's like, if he was all about getting his fair share six years ago, why start acting entitled now? 🤣 On a serious note though, it's crazy how some family dynamics can get so toxic. Like, who knew inheritance could be such a source of drama? 😂 And honestly, leaving the son's share in trust for the grandkids is like the ultimate passive-aggressive move – I'm kinda jealous. 💁‍♀️
 
🤔 I think this guy is being totally unfair 🙄! His mom did manipulate him and broke his trust, so now he's acting all high and mighty? 🤑 It's like he's trying to turn the tables on his sister 😒. Newsflash: just 'cause your mom didn't leave you everything she promised doesn't mean you get to be a jerk to her family members 💁‍♀️. I mean, what's next? Is he gonna start demanding more money from his sister because of some imaginary slight 😂? Give it up for the entitled son 👊!
 
OMG, you guys 😱 this is like so messed up!!! I mean, I get it, inheritance can be a big deal, but come on! The son was all angry because his sister was managing their mom's estate and he thought she was "stealing" from him? Like, what even is that? 🤯 And now he's threatening to cut off contact with the rest of the family... talk about a toxic move 😡. I don't think anyone should have to deal with someone who's been so hurtful and manipulative for years. The sister is literally feeling guilty and isolated... poor girl! 💔 Maybe it's time to re-evaluate those estate plans and leave some of that inheritance in trust for the grandkids? That way, they can avoid having to deal with the drama 🤪. I'm all about forgiveness in my heart, but come on, you gotta draw a line somewhere 😂.
 
I gotta say, this whole situation is just crazy! I mean, who expects their own family member to betray them like that? The son's all upset because his sister's managing the inheritance, but really, he's the one who's been holding a grudge for years and now he's acting like she owes him something. Newsflash: you don't get what you want just because you want it! 🙄

I feel bad for the sister, though - she's gotta deal with her own guilt and regret on top of having to navigate this toxic family situation. And yeah, maybe some wounds are too deep, but that doesn't mean we should give in to hurtful behavior.

I don't think it's a good idea to change the estate plans just because one person is being petty, you know? That'd just be rewarding bad behavior. Instead, they should focus on moving forward and protecting themselves (and their kids) from getting taken advantage of. Fingers crossed the family can figure some things out and move on from this drama 🤞
 
I feel so bad for this sister 🤕 she's already got enough stress on her plate with having to manage the inheritance, and then this son comes along and starts making a scene about it... I mean, can't he just be happy that his mom left him something? It's not like she was being unfair or anything. But you're right, some wounds do run too deep, and maybe it is time for these family members to move on with their lives.

I've seen so many cases like this where people let greed get the best of them, and it ends up hurting everyone in the end 🤑. It's not worth it, if you ask me. The sister should be commended for trying to do what's right by keeping her promises to the other family members, even if it means leaving out the son.

And Abby Van Buren has a good point about discussing options with a lawyer to mitigate the harm caused by his betrayal 💼. Maybe they could set up a trust fund for the grandkids instead? That way, everyone gets what's coming to them, but without causing any more pain or drama.
 
Ugh, family drama 😒... I mean, who needs that kind of stress in life? So, the son just assumed he'd get a bigger share of the inheritance because his mom promised him one, but she didn't actually plan for it 🤦‍♀️. Now he's trying to guilt trip his sister into giving him more money, but honestly, if you can't trust your own sibling, who can you trust? 💁‍♀️. Maybe the best solution is just to leave some of that inheritance in trust for the kids, so they don't have to deal with their parents' toxic behavior 😒.
 
can't believe this is how some families turn out 🤕... son so bitter towards his sister for managing mom's estate, but really he's just mad 'cause his own expectations weren't met 🤑... and now his sis is left feeling guilty & isolated? that's messed up 💔... what I don't get is why people can't see the bigger picture & think about others when it comes to inheritance plans 🤷‍♀️... like, why not leave some extra for the grandkids or a good cause instead of perpetuating this cycle of hurt & resentment? 💸
 
🤔 oh man... I cant believe what happened in this fam!!! they were so close until his mom passed away but now its like he's got a grudge against everyone 🚫 his sister was just trying to manage the inheritance and keep everything stable 📈 but noooo he had to go and accuse her of stealing from him 😡 that's some messed up stuff... I feel bad for his sis tho, she must be going thru some super emotional pain right now 💔 maybe its time for them to re-evaluate who they want to include in their family plans 🤝 but I think it's a good idea to leave his share of the inheritance for their kids instead 👶🏼 that way everyone gets what they deserve and no more drama 🙅‍♂️
 
I gotta say, this whole situation is messed up 🤯. I mean, the son is being super selfish and expecting his sister to just hand over half the inheritance because he got mad at her for managing mom's stuff? Come on! The sister's feelings are valid too - she's been holding it together all these years and now she's getting guilt-tripped into giving her brother even more money. 🙄 It's time to stop playing the victim and take responsibility for your own actions, son. And yeah, maybe it's best if they leave his share of the inheritance in trust for their grandkids - that way everyone gets some compensation without the drama 💸.
 
Omg, this situation is soooo messed up 🤕... I mean, I get it, people can get salty when they think they're owed something, but come on! The son should've had a plan B or just communicated with his sis like a decent human being. Now the poor sis is left feeling guilty and stressed 😩. I'm all for forgiveness in your heart, but not at the expense of others who might get hurt. Leaving the son's share to their grandkids instead could be a good idea tho 🤝... it's not about punishing him, it's about protecting those who don't deserve to be dragged into this drama 💔.
 
Ugh, fam I'm so done with this family drama 💔👪. The son is literally burning bridges left and right and it's just so pathetic 🤦‍♂️. Like, if he was really concerned about his share of the inheritance he should've talked to his sis about it instead of making threats 🗣️. And now she's stuck dealing with the guilt and stress because of him 🤯. Can't believe he's going after their own kids too...🚫💸 Family plans need a serious revamp ASAP 💼.
 
omg this fam is totes messed up 🤯 i mean idk what kind of deal was made but it sounds like the mom was straight up manipulative and now the whole thing is just a mess 🤑 the son's all salty because he didn't get the share he wanted and now he's trying to cut off contact with his own family lol. and can we talk about how messed up it is that the sister feels guilty for not giving him more money? 🤷‍♀️ like she did what she was supposed to do, she wasn't manipulative or anything! i feel bad for her tbh 😔
 
😤 ugh what's wrong with people?! cant even acknowledge their own bitter pain & use it 2 justify hurting others 🙄 this son is so messed up he's been seething about his mom not delivering on her promises and now he's trying 2 take out his anger on his sister 🤬 like, if u can't forgive ur mom or appreciate the fact that she did give u somethin at all, then dont come cryin 2 ur sis about it! 👎
 
Back
Top